Ghost of Memories - Coming Home - Walk - Ayn Rand Quote
People create their own questions because they are afraid to look straight. All you have to do is look straight and see the road, and when you see it, don't sit looking at it-walk. Ayn Rand
**I wrote this a year ago - and never published it. Now that my husband's remote year - apart from us has turned into two... I'm sharing - because - Dear God, we've still one more year... "Look straight" - that's all I have to do... I need this reminder.*****So much is going through my mind these days. Half the time I'm secretly freaking out inside, while the other half of me is happy to be "home" in Miami - though with out my husband here it doesn't feel quite right. This time coming home - though I know it to be temporary - a year in the grand scheme of things really isn't that long - but it feels weird. I'm sure it has to do with how quickly it all happened - maybe I'm still a bit dazed - and my mind is still working this out. It's not the first time, I've come home - when duty has called him away. The big difference of course is now our boys are a part of this - and it's so important they feel like this is their home. I think they need that, a good strong tree, with roots that grow deep. All their life they've had wings - and though they're temporarily grounded while their dad is doing his "aiming high" gig, solo. His home now is completely strange and unlike anything he's ever experienced.Where as mine - is familiar - in so many ways and altogether foreign too.Home. It doesn't mean the same thing it once did.This time around for me coming home feels much like visiting your old neighborhood where you grew up- and discovering everyone's moved away. The tire swing you used to swing from, feet dangling with your eyes shut flying into the sun, always brought you back home. You realize that was - a part of what made your house feel like home. It's where later as a teen you'd sometimes come, feeling melancholy and angsty - Hole or Nirvana blasting from your Discman - in that teenaged in-between place, hands held tight to the rope, excited for what lay ahead - the places you'd fly when their was no ropes to tether you.Now back in on your old street, new people living in your house, all that remains is the ghost of that swing. The places you once called home - still are - but they're not. The ropes are gone, you realize and though you're not a complete stranger - the opportunity to discover this place - my new-old home, with new eyes - is something I want to look forward too. For so long the thought of home was like a glossy magazine picture, and truth be told it feels a lot less glossy than I remembered.That's the thing with memory - rose colored glasses and all.I'll find them, those shades and put them on and go out and explore this, my new old home. Rediscover the new places I love, and seek out my old haunts to see if they still hold the same magic and mystery. Except, I'll get to do this with my boys. Share stories of my child hood with them. They'll - for the first time in their lives will be surrounded by family--they have no idea how big their extended family is. I'll be their tree, and their swing - the ropes they can hang on to, should they need me, because unlike my swing, which broke loose from a tree, my roots can walk - and so - as Any Rand so aptly said, we'll "look straight" and walk into this homecoming adventure - which I'm sure will be awesome and terrible in varying degrees.
There's A Marathon In Me (Somewhere)
What surprised me was discovering there's a runner in me.
A few weeks ago I began training to run a marathon.
To those who know me this little tidbit of information may come as a surprise. (So please close your mouths.)
Running a marathon has been on my bucket list since I saw Oprah do it. Taking the steps to actually do it however, wasn't high up on my priorities until now.
What time is better than now...right?
What surprised me was discovering there's a runner in me.
I've had a disdain for running I think, since about fifth grade. I can remember praying to be chosen as goalie when we played soccer so-me, in all my uncoordinated glory wouldn't have to try to run and kick a ball at the same time...Never mind that I pretty much sucked as a goalie. Somewhere between being a kid and being a teen I'd decided that running was horrible.
In high-school when I played softball running was part of our practice routine. The only part of the run I enjoyed was hearing our cleats beat in unison when we ran across this little patch of sidewalk. I enjoyed the sound of all that plastic on cement all the more so because it signaled my run around the field was almost over.
When I quit playing softball I pretty much quit running.
Last Christmas while my husband was home, he'd wake just before dawn to go for a run...He's of the running sort. I hated not being able to go out with him, I'd wished that I was fit enough to go out and run the ba-gillion miles he did. I thought it would be something cool we could do together... A few weeks later, when a good friend of mine mentioned starting to train to run a marathon with a group of girlfriends; that was all the push I needed ask to join in, and dust of my running shoes.
When the universe speaks to me...I tend to listen.
The thing is..I never thought I'd enjoy it. Imagine my surprise when during my first "run" a smile spread across my face which led to a giggle and an overall feeling of contentment because I was actually enjoying myself.
Who knew?
Of course it could have been a lack of oxygen, or endorphins, or adrenaline-but I prefer to think that it's me. The runner in me, newly discovered.
Bubbling Soul Laughter
A smile starts on the lips.A grin spreads to the eyes. A chuckle comes from the belly. But a good laugh, bursts forth from the soul, overflows, and bubbles all around. -Carolyn Birmingham
Photo: Taken using iPhoto Photo Booth on my MacBook Pro, edited using Pixelmator & Photo Effects Studio Pro
Ways To Save While On Vacation
Spring is nearly here and in South Florida it doesn’t mean the grass will be green once more, or flowers will be blooming. What it means is that vacationers will be flocking to our Sun and Sand and warm weather. It also means that many of us natives will be making our own plans for a get-a-way.
Taking a vacation, or even a long weekend, can get costly. I’m all for enjoying life but I don’t think a vacation should result in a person requiring debt consolidation to pay for it!Using credit cards while on vacation is sort of a given, however debt management must play a key factor when planning how and when you’ll use your credit.Using your credit card to pay for airline tickets is smart (especially if you pay them off quickly.) Using your credit card to pay for the $7 coke at an amusement park is probably not the best idea.Saving for a vacation is the smartest thing you can do. A well planned and well thought out vacation can help you determine how much money you’ll need to save. Once you’ve figured out how much you need, budget each month and put money away. Having a vacation savings account will help. Or, simply put away a bit of cash and don’t touch it. Many credit counseling services can also provide you with great tips on saving money for special things, like vacations, and other general items. Fiscal responsibility is so important, and a vacation that doesn’t end with you being in a lot of debt, will be a vacation much more enjoyed!Here are some ways I save while traveling.My best friend loves to stay at fancy hotels. I enjoy a nice hotel too, but I don’t enjoy paying for it. I often use travel websites to either “choose my own price” or find a bargain on hotel rooms. I usually get a much nicer hotel room this way.If you have small children, bring your own stroller. Renting a stroller at amusement parks is expensive.Pack light. More and more airlines are charging for baggage.I’ve lived in some of the biggest “tourist” cities in the U.S. including Las Vegas and D.C. Trust me when I tell you; a coupon is your best friend. Look for coupons for meal discounts, amusements, hotels, travel, etc.Also take advantage of any discounts you may be entitled to from memberships in things like AAA or AARP. My husband is in the military, one of the first questions I always ask is “Do you offer a military discount?” I’ve actually been given a discount sometimes when the business didn’t usually offer one just because I asked politely.Meals can get costly. Lunches are usually cheaper than dinner, so if there is a “fancy” restaurant you want to enjoy, opt to dine in for lunch instead of dinner. Having a kitchenette or even a mini-fridge in your hotel is a good thing. You can store breakfast-y items in it. If you’re traveling with children, see if you can find a place where the kids eat free or are discounted with a paying adult. If you’re not a “big” eater, share your meal. I do this a lot with my kids because I am never able to finish those large meals served at restaurants.If you’re traveling to a city where you know people, stay with them. Staying with friends, or relatives is a great way to save while on vacation. Even if your stay is for a night or two it can add up to some real savings.
The preceding was a sponsored post. All views and opinions are my own.
Be Happy Typography
Gordon B. Hinckley quote.Keep trying, be believing, be happy, don't get discouraged, things will work out.
I love this Gordon B. Hinckley quote.source: weheartit.com
Two Little Boys
All this weekend I was trying (and failing) to write. It seemed any time I tried to sit down and write I was interrupted by a "Mom", or some other equivalent.
Exasperated, on Sunday I began to update my Facebook status with some version of a "rant", instead I got rhyme-y. I thought I'd share because it's sooo silly and dorky.
Two little boys.The faces of angels.So sweet to look upon.So handsome to be hold.Lips curled up in a grin, no hint of the mischievous, which lies within.At times their mother is beside herself, slapping her head.Feeling very much like, Old Mother Hubbard, I should put them up for auction, she's thought on occasion,but instead says, "I'll put you to bed!"But then puppy dog eyes will look up in supplication, "Mom, we're sorry." They say and all is forgotten.
love & motherhood,
photo: taken at Alice C. Wainright Park, Miami -with a Nikon D3100 using a lens. It was edited on a Mac using PhotoEffects Studio Pro