Busy Life

Since my husband deployed last October, the "busy" in my life has grown exponentially - and not the normal playing "two roles" busy, but busy with volunteer activities, meetups, kids things, and I've been faithfully working on my fitness. All in all apart from the expected mishaps that only seem to happen when one's husband deploys [key word for sewage spewing from your pipes] and the part where my husband is deployed things have been pretty great here. I'm still in love with Italy but as I've lived here nearly a year I am beginning to miss some of the conveniences that we have in the U.S. that just aren't part of the culture here.This last week I've been fighting this sinus thing I've aptly named the "Aviano Funk" and so today I am at last taking a full day to rest which involved me not leaving my house for anything apart from dropping off and collecting my boys from their school bus stop. Watching old movies and working on giving my blog a makeover I've wanted to do for some time.I am absolutely pleased with the results. I initially was veering toward using fonts that mimicked a typewriter but found it to be too distracting and since the overall look I'm going for is plain and simple I settled on what you see before you. It's probably the happiest I've ever been with a theme for my blog in years.Yay!It's hard to believe our first winter here is nearly over.  We've had a lot of rain which I wasn't expecting and to my surprise absolutely adore. If I remember correctly in the last month we've only had a few days where we saw the sun. It's beginning to get annoying but I just think about how glorious and green our Spring will be.

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Here I Love You, Aqui Te Amo - Pablo Neruda Poem

Being separated from my husband is not something that is unfamiliar to me. This poem expresses the longing I feel to be near his bones so perfectly. So keenly. Indeed I think what made Neruda a great romantic poet was not his ability to write about love but to express it's completeness, it's at times imperfection, or complication so truthfully.

 Here I Love You

Here I love you.In the dark pines the wind disentangles itself.The moon glows like phosphorous on the vagrant waters.Days, all one kind, go chasing each other.The snow unfurls in dancing figures.A silver gull slips down from the west.Sometimes a sail. High, high stars.Oh the black cross of a ship.Alone.Sometimes I get up early and even my soul is wet.Far away the sea sounds and resounds.This is a port.Here I love you.Here I love you and the horizon hides you in vain.I love you still among these cold things.Sometimes my kisses go on those heavy vesselsthat cross the sea towards no arrival.I see myself forgotten like those old anchors.The piers sadden when the afternoon moors there.My life grows tired, hungry to no purpose.I love what I do not have. You are so far.My loathing wrestles with the slow twilights.But night comes and starts to sing to me.The moon turns its clockwork dream.The biggest stars look at me with your eyes.And as I love you, the pines in the windwant to sing your name with their leaves of wire.

 *****

Aquí Te Amo

En los oscuros pinos se desenreda el viento.Fosforece la luna sobre las aguas errantes.Andan días iguales persiguiéndose.Se desciñe la niebla en danzantes figuras.Una gaviota de plata se descuelga del ocaso.A veces una vela. Altas, altas estrellas.O la cruz negra de un barco.Solo.A veces amanezco, y hasta mi alma está húmeda.Suena, resuena el mar lejano.Este es un puerto.Aquí te amo.Aquí te amo y en vano te oculta el horizonte.Te estoy amando aún entre estas frías cosas.A veces van mis besos en esos barcos graves,que corren por el mar hacia donde no llegan.Ya me veo olvidado como estas viejas anclas.Son más tristes los muelles cuando atraca la tarde.Se fatiga mi vida inútilmente hambrienta.Amo lo que no tengo. Estás tú tan distante.Mi hastío forcejea con los lentos crepúsculos.Pero la noche llega y comienza a cantarme.La luna hace girar su rodaje de sueño.Me miran con tus ojos las estrellas más grandes.Y como yo te amo, los pinos en el viento,quieren cantar tu nombre con sus hojas de alambre

Pablo Neruda

Got Plagiarism? - Check Your Writing with Grammarly

I use Grammarly's plagiarism checker because my mother always said that imitation was the greatest form of flattery, and because the internet took her advice too literally I no longer can.When I'm writing and fear I may be imitating a beloved writer too closely Grammerly is my "go to" tool to ensure that my words are indeed my own.

The Fault in Our Stars - By John Green Gutted Me (Book Review)

If you're a reader you have a list of books you want to read. Some you can't wait to open. Some you put off, because you know  in your gut, the story is either going to disappoint you or change you.This was true for me with John Green's The Fault in Our Stars.Of course I knew it was widely acclaimed. I've avoided reviews, or even reading the synopsis except that it was a story about cancer, a boy and a girl, and love.This book gutted me. It totally slayed me. It changed me. It made me, want to write better.This book is a love story yes, but not in a sappy, way. It's heartbreaking, tragic, it made me laugh out loud (literally) and cry. I cried a lot. It's witty and intelligent and alive.Alive?This book is about kids who are dying... Yes. But it is more about living and not in a cheesy post card "live your best life" way, but in a real, gritty, perk-less way that is true.If you've been waiting to read this book as I was. Don't wait. Seize the day and this book.xo

I shall not live in vain - Emily Dickinson

VIIF I can stop one heart from breaking, I shall not live in vain;If I can ease one life the aching,Or cool one pain,Or help one fainting robin Unto his nest again,I shall not live in vain~Emily Dickinson

Zombie Regret - The What Ifs & Should Haves

I came across this quote on tumblr  or pinterest the other day and thought it was cool so I saved it, expecting to add it to my "cool quotes" file or something... Fast forward to today and I'm scanning through my downloads looking for something completely different when I happened upon this quote. I sat and stared at it a few moments and just knew I had to "make" something with it; because upon seeing it again it was clear, the universe was speaking to me. I printed this bad boy out and added it to this little frame.While I put this all together I thought about a conversation I had not ten minutes prior to my re-discovery of this quote . It happened  with an old acquaintance on Facebook and she'd mentioned something she had always wanted to do. I remember her telling me about it and said as much, but though I encouraged her to "give it a go", even in baby steps, she kept making excuses. I felt rather disheartened because I know she could do this thing she wants to do and, I imagine, be wonderful at it.

I really hope she does, do what she always wanted to do. I really, really, really do. Otherwise I fear the zombies known as "what if" and should have" may eat her brains.

I hung my little creation on my inspiration board to remind me that regret is far worse than a zombie apocalypse.

The WHAT-IF's & the SHOULD HAVE's will eat your brain" ~ John O'Callaghan

2013 A Review in Pictures Flipagram

In 2013 I welcomed my husband home after 751 days. Eight months later I kissed him goodbye for what should be 190 days. I kissed him... A lot. Said good bye to family and friends in Miami, fulfilled a life long dream of living in Europe. In Italy I've made some good friends who feel like family, climbed a mountain (sort of), read a ton of books. Wrote some stuff, including a letter to Juliette (and felt her up). I became a soccer mom, sent my baby to Kindergarten, drank a bunch of wine, and even more coffee and tea, and ate way too much gelato. My Gram gives the best hugs and slobbery kisses and I miss them. Oh and I still heart Mr. Darcy!I made this using the Flipagram app and the song is "Sway" by Blue October